I Thought I Was Protecting My Son—But I Was Just Protecting My Pride

My ex, Colin, remarried Dina eight years ago, and I’ve never liked her rudeness. For our son Dax’s 18th graduation, I asked Colin not to bring her, thinking it’d keep the day peaceful. He agreed, but at the event’s end, Dax said, “You’ll never know how much that hurt me.” Shocked, I realized he saw her as part of his life. Reflecting, I admitted my control stemmed from resentment over Colin’s past with Dina. I apologized to Dax over lunch, and he shared how Dina supported him, like during Colin’s surgery. Curious, I invited Dina for coffee. She explained

her side—her love for Colin came after our marriage faded, not as an affair. Over time, we built civility, especially after Dina’s sincere recommendation letter for Dax’s internship. We’re not friends, but united for him. Dax now feels whole, not split. This taught me grudges hurt kids more than protect them—letting go benefits everyone.